[EP14] When Casper Walked In
Nobody asked him to fix it. He did it anyway.
Note: For readers new to the Mansion, each of the eight voices you’ll meet in this Session represents an archetypal part of the internal family system (IFS). These characters form a mythic council inside my psyche. Some protect. Some feel. Some process. Some burn it all down and start again. The identities placed after each name offer a label from my own psyche, reflecting their unique energy and role. You don’t need to know IFS to feel it. But if you do? You’ll recognize the exiles, managers, and firefighters by how they speak. And how they show up on a morning when the body forgot it wanted to be here.
[Scene opens in the conference room. Morning, technically. The chandelier is on but doing the bare minimum.]
Trevor (The Conductor): [yesterday’s shirt, binder open, staring at it without reading it] I’d like to begin.
Kurt (The Curator): [arms crossed, eyes closed] Don’t.
Trevor: I have a four-point —
Kurt: Trevor. I will fold you in half.
[Trevor closes the binder.]
Cyril (The Concierge): [staring at his tea] I made this twenty minutes ago.
Nels (The Counselor): I know.
Cyril: It’s cold.
Nels: I know.
Cyril: I don’t know why I’m still holding it.
Nels: [gently] I know.
[Lenny is at the far end of the table, pen in hand. Seventeen items on the page in front of him. He has been on the first one for forty minutes.]
Lenny (The Collector): [to no one] I have seventeen items requiring attention. The data is all there. I just can’t get to it.
Kurt: What do you mean you can’t get to it?
Lenny: It’s like reaching through fog. Everything I need is on the other side. I can see the shape of it.
Kurt: [opening one eye] That’s the worst thing you’ve ever said.
Lenny: Yes.
[Kurt opens both eyes and looks at Lenny. Lenny looks back. Neither of them says anything.]
Trevor: [quietly, to himself] We can’t just sit here.
Cyril: And yet.
Trevor: Cyril.
Cyril: Trevor.
Trevor: [long pause] Your tea is cold.
Cyril: I’m aware.
[From the corner chair, Artie’s hand appears and retrieves his sketchpad from the floor. Then retreats back under the chair.]
[The door opens.]
[Casper walks in. Shirt open. Unhurried. Holding nothing. He looks around the room once and his expression does not change. He pulls out a chair, sits down, leans back, and crosses one ankle over his knee.]
Casper (The Casanova): [pleasantly] Good morning.
[Silence.]
Kurt: Don’t.
Casper: Don’t what?
Kurt: Be like that.
Casper: Like what?
Kurt: [gesturing at all of Casper] That.
Casper: [looking down at himself] I’m just sitting here.
Cyril: You’re sitting here aggressively.
Casper: I slept well.
Trevor: We know.
Casper: Had a dream. Very enjoyable.
Trevor: Casper —
Casper: Woke up warm. Made coffee. Watched the light come in.
Kurt: [through his teeth] I will end you.
Casper: [unbothered] No you won’t.
[Dion appears in the doorway. Silk robe. Glass of something. He takes in the room, then looks at Casper.]
Dion (The Comedian): [to Casper] You look obscenely well-rested.
Casper: I am.
Dion: [sitting, draping himself across the chair] The rest of us look like we lost a fight with a Tuesday.
Casper: You did.
Dion: [to the room] He’s not wrong.
Trevor: [pinching the bridge of his nose] This is not a productive use of —
Casper: Trevor. When did you last want something?
Trevor: I want this meeting to start.
Casper: Something you’d actually enjoy.
[Trevor opens his mouth. Closes it.]
Dion: [helpfully] Take your time.
Trevor: [after a long pause] ...Simon needs water.
[Simon is drooping by the window.]
Casper: [gently] That’s about Simon.
Trevor: [very quietly] I know.
Casper: [to the table] Here’s the thing about a morning like this. The body has gone gray. It’s not broken — it’s just forgotten that it has preferences. Opinions. Appetite.
Kurt: I have no idea what that means.
Casper: It means you want things, Kurt. You just can’t feel it right now.
Kurt: Like what?
Casper: What do you want for breakfast?
Kurt: [immediately] Eggs.
Casper: There it is.
Kurt: [pause] ...huh.
Dion: [raising his glass] I want to go back to bed. Not in a defeated way. A luxurious way.
Casper: That counts.
Dion: I also want someone to bring me something.
Casper: Also counts.
Dion: [to Cyril] You heard him.
Cyril: [standing, taking his cold tea to the kitchen] I’m making a fresh pot. That’s all that’s happening.
Dion: [calling after him] I’ll take that as a yes.
[Artie’s head appears over the edge of the chair.]
Artie (The Creator): [to Casper, cautiously] What did you want? This morning. When you watched the light.
[Casper looks at him. The small smile goes somewhere quieter.]
Casper: To feel it on my skin. Just that. Nothing complicated.
Artie: Did it work?
Casper: Every time.
[Artie considers this. Then climbs back into his chair properly and opens his sketchpad.]
Nels: [to Casper, simply] You’re good at this.
Casper: At what?
Nels: Reminding us we’re alive.
[Casper looks at the table. Then out the window. Then back at Nels.]
Casper: Somebody has to.
[Cyril returns with a full pot of tea. Sets it in the center of the table. Lenny picks up his pen. Kurt stands and goes to find eggs. Trevor opens his binder and this time actually reads it. Simon has straightened slightly toward the light.]
Dion: [watching all of this] Casper.
Casper: Mm.
Dion: You did that on purpose.
Casper: [heading for the door] Did what?
Dion: All of it.
Casper: [over his shoulder] I just sat here.
[He’s already gone.]
Dion: [to the room, quietly] No he didn’t.
End Session.